Remembering 9/11 What I Teach My Son

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Today, September 11, 2016, marks the 15 year anniversary of the most tragic day in American History during my lifetime. Remembering 9/11 means more to me than just another tragic day though. Just like our grandparents and great-grandparents, who remember exactly where they were and what they were doing on December 7, 1941 I remember exactly where I was and what I was doing September 11, 2001. Here is my account of that day.

Where I was…

I was living in my hometown of Baltimore, MD. Only 45 minutes away from D.C. About an hour from Pennsylvania. I was living with my ex and mother-in-law in a nice 2 bedroom apartment. I had a black cat name Sage and I was 7 months pregnant with my first child. Adam was still growing in my belly that day. In fact, the very next day, September 12th, marked my 7 month mark. That’s where I was that day, 15 years ago. This is me remembering 9/11.

What I was doing…

I was working in a daycare center during my pregnancy and I was helping out in the baby room that day. I was rocking a baby to sleep and looking out the window, enjoying the rays of the sun that were shining through. It was a beautiful morning and we teachers had decided that we would take the babies for a walk in the strollers. It was such a beautiful morning.

We were listening to a CD of baby music. I had to go to the bathroom so I put the baby in a bouncy chair. When I got back from the bathroom, I walked into a dark room with only a few lamps for light. The whole vibe in the room had completely changed. I heard a voice on the radio saying something about the towers but I thought I was listening to a movie preview. I honestly thought that. Looking back, when I play those moments in my head, they play out in slow motion. As if it was something that I should have known. As if it was something we all should have known. That’s how I am remembering 9/11.

Within the hour, most of the children in the daycare center had gone home. Most of the parents of these children worked in D.C. It’s not uncommon for residents of Baltimore to work in D.C. As these parents came to pick up their little ones, I saw them hug their babies tighter than I had ever seen. I saw the fear on their faces. The worry they had for their children.  Slowly it started to hit me but it didn’t really hit me until…

Watching it on TV made it real…

Most of us went home that day. We contacted our families and friends. My ex, my mother-in-law and myself sat in front of the TV and watched the footage. The three of us watched the planes hit each tower. We watched the towers fall. We watched as the people of New York ran from the buildings, covered in soot and trying to make their way through the debris.

remembering911_rockinrandommom I remember seeing a photo of a young woman my age who had died. She was also seven months pregnant with her first child. She was expecting a boy and had named him Connor. I remember feeling a sense of survivor’s guilt because I was alive. My baby was going to be born while hers didn’t even have a chance. I grieved for her and her baby. five years later when my Conner was born, I thought of her and her baby. Even though his dad and I settled on the name from a TV show, I thought of her.

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And what of my son?

I have seen a number of Facebook memes on the incoming freshman this year not being alive that fateful day in 2001 and how they will learn about it history class but will never really know how it felt to live through that day. They will never truly understand the fear, the heartbreak, and the anger we all felt that day and every day since. Our children will not understand how that day changed us as a nation. Do you know what they know? They know our anger. Young boys and girls know how divided we are. The youngest of the millennials don’t remember a time when we came together as a country. They don’t understand what United means when we say United States of America.

But my son will. He has. Every year, from the time he was about 4 years old, I told him of that day. His brother knows too. My boys may not fully understand the emotions behind that day. Maybe they won’t understand the significance of that tragedy and how it changed our country but they know that I remember. They have seen my tears. They felt my sadness. Remembering 9/11 is a part of their lives because it is a part of mine.

Where were you that day?

I don’t often listen to country but this song by Alan Jackson is for this day and I’m dedicating to Remembering 9/11

 

Thanks so much for reading!

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I am linking this with these rockin’ linkies:

My Random Musings
Pink Pear Bear
DomesticatedMomster

 

 

Getting My Gamer Girl On!

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So the past two weeks have been kind of a lazy, yet productive time for me. I got a few personal things done that I needed to get squared away but during this time I really needed to zone out by getting my gamer girl on!

It started out as me thinking of my future YouTube channel and mulling over the different reviews I want to do. Of course one of my first reviews will be my take on Dragon Age: Inquisition. Yeah, I know, for all you gamer geeks out there, I am coming into this a bit late seeing as how the game is almost two years old already and won game of the year.

dragonagegameofyear_rockinrandommomAnywho, So what started out as my attempt to refresh some of my memory of the game so that I can portray an accurate assessment of my opinion, ended up with me geeking out and playing the game for days on end, completely ignoring other things. I know this flaw in myself so I always made sure the things that needed to get done, got done before I started my gaming binge, as I like to call it.

I am lucky, too, that my boys are old enough now that I have a bit more freedom to play but I always make sure my babies are taken care of and on the nights when their dad had them, oh it was on like Donkey Kong baby! I rocked out in my jammies, drinking lots of coffee so that I could stay up as late as my 39 year old body could stand, propped up on my couch with three comfy pillows, only getting up when I needed to use the little girl’s room. This, my friends, is me getting my gamer girl on!

I also had my notepad and pen next to me to write down notes for my review. See, it wasn’t all wasted, ha ha! However, this was more than just me needing to jot down notes and prepare for a review. I needed this time to zone out from the world. I barely got online, with the exception of the occasional ding I would get on my phone when someone sent me a tweet, or check an email or two. Mostly, though, I stayed away from the internet. I even stayed away from Cable TV.

Yes, I have missed the last two episodes of Game of Thrones and three episodes of Outlander, not to mention three or four episodes of Fear the Walking Dead… That’s what DVR is for! I have a lot of catching up to do so no spoilers please! That’s another reason I’ve stayed away from Facebook in particular. I don’t want any spoilers of my favorite TV shows!

As I said earlier though, the past two weeks weren’t all fun and gaming. I finally got my student loan stuff worked out and and still working on taking care of some stuff on my credit report so that I can get a new car. I am finally getting rid of my old car because it’s just too broken for me to fix it. Had to deal with some housing issues as well and finally got my resume looking pretty good, so that’s a plus! All of these things I worked on one at a time but as any of you know, even the small stressors in life can weigh a person down and it was this, proud as I am of myself for getting shit done, that I needed a breather.

Back to my game. So, yes I use gaming as a way to escape this world sometimes. It doesn’t happen that often anymore as I have found several other ways to zone out but this time I had a date with my characters in Dragon Age: Inquisition and they gave me the solace I needed that helps me hit that refresh button on my soul when the world just gets to be a little too much.

In Dragon Age: Inquisiton I can be one of four races – Dalish Elf, human Noble, Qunari Tal Vashoth, Dwarven Carta and in these races I can be a warrior, a mage, or a rogue either male or female. I have two of every single character, both male and female! This game allows me to step into a new world where I get to fight dragons, use magical armor and weapons, have a romance (or two), and save the world! Below is the video that I absolutely love and sums up the game perfectly in my opinion so check it out! The band who sings the song is called The Phantoms! If you like this song, be sure to check them out as well!

I am linking this with:

My Random Musings
Reflections From Me
Rhyming with Wine
The Secret Diary of Agent Spitback
Cuddle Fairy

 

 

The A-Z of Me: Challenge

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Trista over at Domesticated Momster wrote a piece on this and I was so intrigued by it that I thought this would be a great challenge for myself to do on my own blog. It is going to be challenging for me though as I am going to try to not mention things about me that I have already told you, which is a lot so far. So without further ado, I am going to take a crack at this challenge, the A-Z of Me.

A: I don’t like Apple Pie! Very un-American of me, I know but here me out. I love the smell of apple pie and I love apples but when it comes to apple pie, I just can’t eat it, blah!

B: I used to have my Belly Button pierced.

C: Unlike Trista, (sorry girl), I prefer Cats over dogs. Don’t get me wrong, Dogs are great but I just get the feline. They do things on their own terms, in their own time and they don’t tolerate being pushed around, prodded, or messed with and I completely relate to that!catnodding_rockinrandommom

D: Conner just told me that I’m pretty Distant from people sometimesThat is definitely true. While I’ve made some great blogger friends, I’ve had a lot of negative experiences with people both online and in person and those experiences have caused me to become distant. The older I get, the more I just want genuine and positive people in my life, no exceptions. I won’t settle for less.

E: An Eternal life with music! (Thanks Trista for helping me out with this one!)

F: I have a brother named Frank.

G: I truly appreciate a Great cup of coffee, a Great glass of wine, and Great sex!!

H: My home is my sanctuary. It is my safe haven and I don’t like to share it…Except with my boys. They are always welcome!

I: Sometimes I have to show my Inner Bitch if for no other reason than to let people know not to trifle with me.

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J: I am Just a little crazy…or a lot, depending on my mood, LOL!

K: Despite periodically needing to fight my inner demons, I have a kind heart…but I am very cautious with it.

L: I Love to make my children Laugh. Haha…two L’s.

M: Marriage taught me a lot. One thing I learned is that I don’t like being married. It’s not for me! Refer to letter H if you don’t understand.

N: Nail Polish is the only truly girly thing that I do. Every month I wear a different color!

O: Outlander is my new favorite TV show!! It’s about a married combat nurse in the 40’s being sent back to 1700’s Scotland where she meets and later marries a young Scottish warrior played by Sam Heughan. Awesome, awesome show!!

P: I am usually a very Positive person. Remember that what you put out into the world comes back to you.

Q: If I get Quiet during an argument, Run. Just Run!

R: One of my favorite bands right now is a band called Red. They are awesome! I will have a video of one of their songs at the end of this post. Check it out!

S: I’m on the fence about Soul Mates. I want to believe they exist and that I have one but the realist in me strongly disagrees.

T: I don’t Trust easily. If  I do take a chance on someone and decide to trust, they usually prove me wrong. Trust is a huge deal for me.

U: Taking the time to try to Understand me, earns you some major brownie points! I am often misunderstood.

V: When I was 8 years old and got my first room to myself, my aunt painted the walls Violet and the carpet was dark purple. That was the start of my love of the color purple.

W: I’d rather be a Warrior than a princess. Maybe I was on in a past life?

X: I never got into the show The X-Files.

Y: I’ve been told that I look a good 10 years Younger than I actually am. This doesn’t always get me the respect I deserve.

Z: I have said this before but for those not paying attention, my Zodiac sign is Cancer but I’m on the cusp of Leo. This means that I am part of the Oscillation cusp, which basically means I am very complicated!

So there you have it, the A-Z of me! This challenge was much harder than I thought. Took me a few days to finish it but here it is. What about you? Are you up for the challenge?  As promised, one of my favorite music videos by one of my favorite bands:

I am linking this with:

Domesticated Momster
My Random Musings
Pink Pear Bear
The Secret Diary of Agent Spitback
Cuddle Fairy

The Sister Interview

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The Sister Interview

I have a sister who knows me better than anyone (well, besides my kids that is). So, I called my sister, Jen, and did a phone interview. Even though we live in different states in the U.S. my sister still knows me best, well, almost…

Where did your sister grow up?

Baltimore.

Yep! In a little neighborhood called Middle River, in Baltimore County to be exact.

What is your sister’s favorite flowers?

Uh, I have no clue.

Me: I don’t like flowers.

Jen: I didn’t think so. Neither do I.

They’re pretty but…no.

How/Where did you meet?

When I was born. Oh, and she’s been very protective over me ever since.

Yep! I was three and I’ve looked out for her ever since.

What was/is your sister’s job?

Working with children.

Yeah, I was a Developmental Specialist, working with children 0-3 with developmental delays

When and why did your sister start blogging?

She started months ago because she needed to express herself

Yes, I was feeling pretty lost after quitting my job and I felt a huge drive to express myself in a different way and blogging just sort of presented itself to me.

What does your sister blog about?

Her children mostly. And life issues like healing from our bad childhood.

Yes, that is why I started. I also blog about music, fitness, and the like.

What are your sister’s hobbies apart from blogging?

Reading, video games, TV shows, Movies, working out, music

She got this mostly right but I will add hiking to the list. Sadly, I haven’t read a book since The Hunger Games series.

What is your sister’s favorite perfume?

Uh, do body sprays count? Your favorite scent is lavender.

Lavender yes, but I love Chinese Cherry Blossom by Bath and Body Works.

What do you and your sister enjoy doing together?

Watching old movies, talking, listening to music, and drooling over hot guys with tattoos while drinking some wine…or margaritas!

Okay, I couldn’t help myself from laughing at this one. It’s funny because it’s so true!

What does your sister love about you?

What doesn’t she love about me? **busts out laughing while trying to be serious** She loves that I can make her laugh.

Yes, I am definitely laughing!! She’s also right. There’s nothing I don’t love about her.

Who are your sister’s favorite Authors?

Uh, Stephen King. *thinks for a minute* that lady who wrote the books about the orphan. You used to love those books. What was her name?

Me: Lucy Maud Montgomery

Jen: Yeah her! You like her!

I do still like her. She wrote my favorite books the Anne of Green Gables series.

How does your sister show you she loves you?

She calls me and checks on me to make sure I’m still alive. *laughs* Cuz she’s awesome!

Yeah, I don’t like talking on the phone much so if I call, it’s because I care and a few years back, my sister had some personal issues. I was calling her every single day to make sure she was alive. It’s now an inside joke between us because I’m the protective big sister who has sometimes had to be mom throughout our lives.

What are your sister’s best traits?

Her personality and how strong she is.

Awe! Now I’m tearing up a little. *sniff*

What are your sister’s worst habits?

Not cleaning!!

I hate to clean! My sister is all OCD about the cleaning and I’m all like, pfft, whatever. I’ll do it tomorrow.

What are your sister’s favorite TV Shows?

Supernatural (those guys are hot!).  Uh, I can’t think. A lot of shows.

*my son over hears the question: “Aunt Jen, it’s Buffy.”*

Jen: Oh yeah, duh! Buffy, the Vampire Slayer. I just had a brain fart!

…and Vampire Diaries, The Walking Dead, Game of Thrones, I could go on!

Who/what are your sister’s favorite singers/bands?

Bon Jovi…but she listens to all sorts of music. It depends on her mood.

That is sort of correct! Bon Jovi will always be my favorite but while I do listen to lots of music, alternative rock is my favorite.

What is your sister’s favorite meal and drink?

Coffee! We drink that shit every day! Food though, uh, Italian?

Yes, yes, yes to coffee!! Food, close enough. It’s actually spaghetti, which is Italian. I say it her all the time: I like my food like I like my men…ITALIAN!!

What would be your sister’s ideal weekend getaway?

A California beach

Actually, no. My ideal weekend getaway would be a cabin in the woods, away from the rest of the world because sometimes I need to check out. California was a childhood dream of mine.

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So there is my sister interview. Again, I want to wish Anxious Dragon, aka, Tracey, the best of luck! Miss you and hope to see you again!

I am linking this with:

The Secret Diary of Agent Spitback
Cuddle Fairy
Mummuddlingthrough
Domesticated Momster
Reflections From Me
Pink Pear Bear

My St. Patrick’s Day Blessings

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This week has been a roller coaster of different happenings. Even though there was a mixture of positive and negative emotions going on for me I have also had a few blessings blow my way just in time for St. Patrick’s Day, which happens to be one of my favorite holidays. It’s as if St. Patrick himself is smiling down on me! Here are a few things happening this week:

  • As some of you know, my teenager was really sick for a week and I was worried about him having Pneumonia. I finally took him to the doctor and the doctor assured me that despite them seeing a lot of Pneumonia this year, my son lucked out and got Bronchitis instead. He was put on a five day antibiotic and has returned to school his normal, happy-go-lucky self and I couldn’t be happier. As any parent reading this will understand, it’s hard on us seeing our kids sick or hurt in any way so when they feel better, it’s a huge sigh of relief!
  • As my last post mentioned, or rather implied, I’ve been in a bit of funk lately, especially pertaining to my blog and writing in general. Not knowing where to take my blog and the stress of constantly promoting with no time to actually write, I said I needed to take some time to figure some things out. My main goal now is to write. Promotion will continue to be a part of my blogging agenda but it won’t take over my brain. Since taking on this new train of thought, I have actually been getting some great ideas for my new content for my blog as well as writing my stories!
  • A good thing that happened was after paying all of my bills, I actually had some play money so I went to ancestry.com and sent for my DNA test. I have been a part of Ancestry for several years now but because they’re a bit expensive, and I’m not too happy with how they sucker people into signing up for their most expensive memberships, I haven’t been too involved with it. However, a random fact about me is that I love learning about my heritage and I can’t wait to get the test back to see what I actually have in my blood line!
  • Once my son was back at school, I was finally able to start concentrating on myself and I found some new music that I really like. The most surprising of this music though is a few of these bands I recently discovered are Christian/Gospel. I haven’t listened to that kind of music since the 90’s when Jars Of Clay and DC Talk were popular. I was very much into the church back then so I listened to the music but it’s been years and wow have they changed! I mean, I’ve been listening to Skillet and RED now for a few years but discovering new bands like them is kind of blowing my mind! At the end of the day though, I don’t care what genre I’m listening to. If I connect with the lyrics and the music, I’m going to listen to it.
  • This week I found out that Easter is at the end of this month and this has me frustrated. This may just be me and my own weirdness but for me, March is reserved for St. Patrick’s Day. April is for Easter. I don’t care that it’s leap year. There are four Sundays in April…Pick one!  Easter is not a favorite holiday for me but I will write more about that in my next post.
  • After not working out for over a week I was finally able to go for a walk yesterday before it rained. FYI: I didn’t know it was going to rain. I was driven to go for a walk and walk I did. It just so happen that as soon as I walked through the front door of my apartment building, the rain started to come down. Another sign to me that St. Patrick – or someone up there- is looking out for me!
  • The Goonies was on the other night and I tried to get Conner to watch it with me but he was too busy playing Minecraft to pay attention. That is until the end when he started asking me a million questions about what was happening. It got me thinking though: His dad introduced him to the Back to the Future movies and I introduced him to Spaceballs last week, which he loved so I’m going to start playing some of those old movies I watched as a kid for my boys!

All in all I am in a good place right now. I’m finally getting myself back to working out and I’ve been slowly re-organizing my house and getting my own brain back up to par with my dreams and goals.

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I am linking this with:

My Random Musings

 

 

Pink Pear Bear
Cuddle Fairy