Bucket List Time! A New Decade, A New Chapter

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I’ve actually had a bucket list in my head for awhile but I have never written it down. Ever since I saw Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson in the movie The Bucket List I’ve wanted to make a list of my own. Though jumping out of a plane is definitely NOT on my bucket list, I do have a few things I want to do before it’s too late to do them.

But First, About my Birthday…

This past Friday I celebrated my 40th Birthday. I had originally wanted to celebrate with a few of my female friends at home with drinking and games and shootin’ the shit but the ladies thought it would be great to go out. I wasn’t all that sure as I am not big on the partying these days but I went out.  what the hell though right? It’s not like I do it very often and it was my birthday.

Before heading out though we all had a glass of wine and a few jello-o shots for the road. Then we picked up our 4th party goer at work where the girls surprised me with a piece of birthday cake. After the song was sung and the cake was eaten – I needed help eating it as it was very good but so rich – we headed to our destination.

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We went to a place called The Tunnel Bar and I fell in love with the Martini bar and the seating area was so comfy!You literally are walking through a small tunnel as you enter. The leather seats and coffee tables are on either side of you as you walk towards the Martini bar. I should have taken pictures because it was very cozy but of course I didn’t. I had my first Raspberry Truffle Martini. Well, two actually. They were so damn good! After our drinks the girls took me upstairs to the dance floor. They wanted to dance. I wasn’t feeling it but I followed them.

There was another bar upstairs where we all had a birthday cake shot. It wasn’t that good but it certainly had a bang and I was definitely feeling the liquor in my system by then. The dance floor was way too crowded with way too many 20-somethings around me and the music was unfamiliar. They only played two songs I actually knew. Yep! That made me feel a bit on the old side.

After dancing to one or two songs we went outside for some air. At that point I remember we were chatting up a very nice police officer then heading back to the car. When we got back to my place we chit chatted for awhile before passing out. The night was fun, even if it wasn’t what I had in mind. It was a good time and I was definitely hungover the next day.

So Now to my Bucket List….

bucketlist_rockinrandommomAll the next day I pretty much laid on the couch watching Ghost Brothers on my DVR. Occasionally Conner would come cuddle with me but I had time to think and reflect on many things that day. One of them being my bucket list. I’m still working on this list. I think I will be working on it for at least the next ten years because there will always be things I want to do.

 

 

 

Here is my list so far:

  1. Travel to the UK – I have wanted to see Ireland, England, Wales, and Scotland since I was a child. From books I’ve read to movies I’ve seen the landscape just looks so beautiful and amazing and the history! Oh the history! From Queen Elizabeth I -who is one of my historic feminine heroes- to visiting ancient Viking settlements, to actually seeing up close Stonehenge, I cannot wait to go there!
  2. Visiting the rest of Europe – I look forward to visiting France, Germany, Italy, Greece, and many other countries in Europe with so much history!
  3. Finally finish my first book – Maybe even get two published!
  4. Go on a three day hiking trip – I know this one seems small but I’ve been busy raising children and I haven’t had the time or the money so now it’s on my bucket list.
  5. Conquer some of my fears – Like my fear of tall heights and my fear of spiders. This one will be the hardest one on my list.

As I said, I’m still working on this list but these are my top 5 things I want to do within the next 20 years. Yes you read that right. 20 Years! I want to give myself some time to complete this list. Especially about the spiders. I am so not ready for that one!

Have you made a bucket list yet? What’s on it? Leave a comment below:)

Thanks so much for reading!

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July Goals and Turning 40

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Yep! This is the month I turn the big 4-0! Turning 40 has been on my mind a lot lately. Actually, my 40th birthday has been on my mind since New Year’s, if I’m being completely honest here. It’s not something I have been looking forward to. In fact, I’ve been dreading it, though not for the reasons you might think.

I dread turning 40 because I don’t want to leave my thirties. And no, it’s not because thirties are younger. Truth be told it has nothing to do with age. I learned so much about myself in my thirties.  I struggled through mental illness most of my life. In my thirties, I fought back. I worked my ass off to overcome my past. Through this work, I learned to accept myself while still working to become a better version of me.

I learned to forgive those who have hurt me. I have also learned to forgive myself. Forgiveness was something I never thought I would know. But it was a goal I set in my thirties and I achieved it. Loving myself was another thing I never thought I would know or understand. Learning to love myself came with healing but I got there. I love myself now. So, turning 40 is bittersweet for me.

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You know how people say that when you close one chapter in your life you start a new one? That’s the exciting part. I’m starting a new decade and writing a new chapter in my book of life. Turning 40 is a good thing. At the same time, it’s incredibly sad for me because it feels like I’m leaving behind a friend.

Rather than sulk though, I have decided that this month I’m going to write posts about my mixed feelings towards turning 40. I am going to write about what this means for me in many different aspects of my life. What does motherhood look like? How about career? Where does love play into it?

I have recently discovered several different blogs that talk about the importance of setting blogging goals. So I’m going to work on that. Until now, I’ve just been winging it. Now that I’m turning 40 I want to set new goals and make new rules for myself.

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Turning 40 is also surreal. It still doesn’t feel like I’m about to be “over the hill”. What does that even mean anyway? Maybe because we are living longer these days, 40 really doesn’t seem like that big a deal. It is a big deal though. It is because now I am a more confidant person. I’m definitely more confidant now than I ever was in my twenties.

Yes, this is what July brings to me. I am looking forward to sharing most of my thoughts with you as I get ready to start this new chapter!

#turning40

Thanks so much for reading!

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Update on the Family: What My Family and I Have Been up to

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Oh there is so much to tell all of you lovely readers out there about what’s been going on with my family. There have been some joys but also some sadness. There have been some ups but quite a few downs. We have even had a couple of deaths including my sister’s father, who, despite not being a huge part of my life was the only man I ever called ‘dad’. I am planning on writing a separate post on that soon so stayed tuned.

 

 

 

Oh my boy has been doing so well this year! His first year of high school has been such a positive experience for both of us. Adam struggled with only a few things in the beginning – like trying out for the school plays and not getting a part – that was hard on him but he adjusted well and didn’t give up and it paid off. Finally, he got a part in his first high school musical! He did such an awesome job too!

My boy had some moments where he didn’t want to do it because he didn’t like the lines or the music hurt his ears. At times, between working so hard on his academics and rehearsals for the musical he got overwhelmed and I had to take the helm for him and let him calm himself by giving him the space and time to just breathe and be himself. Conner also helped. That’s family.

(Adam is the tall one in the back with the sailor hat on)

The social aspects of school and the play was hard sometimes. Autism isn’t easy but Adam worked through it like a champ and the end result was honor roll for the first quarter and a great performance at his play. I thought he was done after that though because he was so exhausted by the end of it but he’s going back at it rehearsing for yet another play! His school is also having a presentation on Autism for Autism Awareness month and Adam is going to speak about what he goes through. I’m so excited for him and can’t wait to see what his presentation will be! #autismawareness

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Conner is doing great in the 4th grade. He works hard and has improved tremendously in spelling, reading, and writing. This year he has struggled with the Math a little but he still is his class’s “Math God” and doing his best. He turned 10 in December and we couldn’t afford a party for him but I did make a video of the first ten years of his life. It’s what I did for Adam on his 10th birthday so I did the same for Conner. 10 is a milestone and so far my baby boy is loving it! FYI: That video is too long for my blog apparently and Facebook won’t let me upload it due to it having songs so here is one of him dancing.

Conner is still a Minecraft nerd but now he’s pretty obsessed with Five Nights at Freddy’s. It is a horror game/book/whatever. Just like back during his Angry birds obsession and My little pony obsession, he now has just about every action figure, book, poster, and of course all the plush toys he can get his hands on. I gotta tell ya, this kid is expensive! But he’s worth it. My family is very important to me and my boys are numero uno. It’s been hard getting him to agree to any sort of after school activities but it’s still a work in progress.

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I started getting pretty depressed around Thanksgiving this year and have struggled with it ever since. I found myself in a funk and it didn’t help that right before Christmas my sister’s father passed away.

family_rockinrandommomAs some of you know I have had some car troubles as well. I can’t seem to get away from car troubles for some reason. Seriously, it’s like I’m cursed. I have bad car Karma and have no idea why. Not having a reliable vehicle has played into being stuck in the house way too much. This, of course vamped up my depression. My family has been a great help just by being there. However, when you take away the car, you take away the independence. This just doesn’t work for me.

Staying fit and eating right has also taken a huge dive but there is some good news to be had. I have ordered a couple of Tai Chi and Yoga DVD’s and well, this will also be another post. Perhaps I will start my fitness series again. I’m still dating the person I met last year but I have been keeping that pretty close to my chest. Maybe I will write about him in the future.

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Thanks so much for reading!

 

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It’s Official: I am on You Tube!

Or as the kids call it…officalyoutube_rockinrandommom

I actually did it! I am officially on You Tube! My son calls me a You Tuber now! I launched my first video on Friday, just before midnight. I was really nervous about uploading a video with me in front of the camera. It’s not that I haven’t been in front of a camera before. There is something about recording yourself, then sharing that with the entire world that is nerve-racking.

It took me about 10 times and literally a whole day and a half to get the right message across for my first video. After that, was the editing that took several more hours to reach my own acceptable standards. The video could have been better but seeing how this is my first go-around with this sort of thing, I’m pretty happy with it.

There will be improvements made as I get more acquainted with You Tube. I still have a lot to learn. I will get more comfortable as time goes on and my videos will get better. I’ve learned a few things already, like

Movie Maker:

Before making my first video I rarely ever used a video editing program. I didn’t even know I had movie maker on my laptop. I also didn’t know how to use my camera or my built in microphone. I had to do a You Tube search to figure it out! Once I did though I found it to be very easy to navigate.

Cutting Video Clips:

Again, not something I was familiar with and that took up most of my hours as I sat at my desk watching myself talk. It was a bit weird for me but once I got into the process of eliminating excess footage, I actually liked it. I enjoyed editing and keeping my video simple. Perhaps I edited it a little too much, LOL!

Copyright Laws:

It’s a bit different on YouTube than on my blog. For example, did you know that for every piece of music, image, and video clipping you put into your video is illegal? Unless you get permission from the copyright company and put their info into the description area, you are not allowed to use it. I see videos on YouTube all the time with music parodies, game reviews and the like. It never dawned on me how much of that actually requires permission. This is the biggest hurdle for me as I will be doing reviews but I have been doing a lot of research into it and it might be easier than I think. You can actually get all of the info you need by searching for it on You Tube! Damn! YouTube has everything!

Watch My video:

The music I have in my intro is royalty free music. The animated intro is also royalty free as long as I include the website I got them from either in my video or in the description.  Now that I have my own image making program though, I will work on changing my intro a little bit. With my new program I will also be working on my blog look so look out for that in the near future.

I still have work to do to make my channel better. There is still so much to learn but I’m getting there. I really want to show my more fun-loving side but I realize that is going to take some time. I need to get more comfortable in front of the camera, which I know will come with experience.

If you watch my video let me know what you think so far! If you want to keep up to date on my videos, I will post one every Friday. You can subscribe to my channel as well. It would be much appreciated!

Thanks so much for reading!

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