Why I’m Not in Love with Valentine’s Day

valentinesday_rockinrandommom

I’m just going to put this out there and get it out of the way…I am not a Valentine’s Day person. That’s right, Valentine’s Day is not my thing. It’s not that I hate Valentine’s Day but that I don’t put much stock in it. I find it boring and a waste of time. I mean seriously, we take one day each year where we HAVE TO show love and affection to our other half, spend a boat load of unnecessary money, just because some holiday says we have to. Where is the fun in that? Here are just a few reasons why I’m not in love with Valentine’s Day:

  • It’s not spontaneous! I realized this while I was married. Each year, my ex and I had certain expectations. Because we were parents and we had little money, we did the same thing every year: dinner, movie, hotel, hot tub. After year three of this, I realized that the best part about romance and sex is that, for me, it needs to be spontaneous. Call me crazy but sex is one of those things that if the spirit moves me, I’m going for it but if it is expected of me, I get cranky and uh, no…just no.
  • Where is the surprise? One of the things I love twillowborednowvalentinesday_rockinrandommomo do is surprise my man. I used to buy sexy cards for my ex for no damn reason. It was just because and I really enjoyed the look on his face when he got those cards. I love surprising the ones I love because I love doing things on a whim. That’s just who I am. Valentine’s Day doesn’t do that for me. Instead, the surprise is limited by “ooh, what’s _______ going to get me this year?” First off, we just left Christmas behind where I’m sure we pretty much got what we wanted. Secondly, if you have been with your other half for a long time, you start to predict what it is they will get you every year. You know each other so well, you can predict this and this becomes boring. Unless that person is truly unpredictable and is able to come up with all sorts of creative ways to surprise you and vice versa, I say leave the gift giving to Christmas and birthdays.
  • Kids get in the way. Let’s face it, as parents, we really don’t have time to be spontaneous and romantic and sexy… We have kids who need our constant attention.  Either they mysteriously get sick that day (this has happened to me a few times), or you can’t find a babysitter at the last minute because, well, in all honesty you forgot about Valentine’s Day until it suddenly smacks you in the face and oh damn, it’s Valentine’s Day already?, or the babysitter decides to cancel on you at the last minute so you resign, once again, to parking your ass in front of the TV with some take-out and you’re lucky if sex even makes an appearance.
  • Romantic gestures should be all year! Now, as a parent, romance isn’t always on my mind. I have a lot going on in my life and I really don’t have time for it. I’m also a single parent so that sort of plays into it but when I was married, the little every day things like when he got up with the baby in the middle of the night or let me sleep in on Sundays, were more important than one big romantic gesture once a year.
  • It adds Stress! We adults are under enough stress just going to work every day, then coming home and raising kids who we are always thinking that we have damaged somehow. Having to remember the holiday and then having to come up with a plan for the day and money to spend is not my idea of romance. Romance should be fun, not stressful.

sheldonlovevalentinesday_rockinrandommomWhen it comes to love, romance, and sex I’m all about the fun and the spontaneity. I love being completely surprised because it makes it that much more special to me. I love living in the moment with it and allowing it to sweep me up into a momentary whirlwind. I am also not one for the big romantic gestures that the movies make such a big deal about. Also, as a single parent, my kids are my Valentines this year

I have my day planned out:

  1.  Take the kids out that day. Maybe some Laser tag and a movie
  2. Order take out for dinner. Chinese take out has become my Valentine’s Day go-to
  3. Have a date with my favorite zombie hunters watching The Walking Dead

 

You can view my post on Lose the Cape which are tips for celebrating for single parents and it’s called Valentine’s Day for the Single Parent

Happy Valentine’s Day and Thanks so much for reading!

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42 thoughts on “Why I’m Not in Love with Valentine’s Day

  1. I am so with you on this, I dont feel I need a day that society tells me I should be grateful to be loved, I prefer a much more spontaneous show of affection for sure!

    1. I’m so glad I’m not the only one who feels this way. One day that I need to be grateful to be loved is a perfect way of putting it:)

  2. To me Valentine’s Day is just a gimmick for shops to make more money. If it is for you and you want to celebrate it then fair game – go for it. But don’t feel pressurised to buy into it. It’s just one day.

  3. I totally agree with you that I don’t think there needs to be a labeled holiday to show love for one another. I think that it should be expressed everyday. And I hate that they jack up the prices for everything for the holiday. Thanks for linking up with #momsterslink. Sorry for the delay in commenting…had company and now the flu has me down for 2 days so far. Yesterday I hardly had the strength to pick up my phone let alone look and type lol.
    Trista, Domesticated Momster recently posted…Throwback Thursday ~ One Pissed Off CustomerMy Profile

    1. Oh I understand. When family visits you should spend time with and I’ve been battling a chest cold and had a bad headache all week. I getcha chica! Hope you feel better soon! 😉

    1. That’s exactly how I see it and what said about it not living up to the expectations is like you took the words right out of my mouth. It’s been my experience that pre-planned expectations and romance don’t always mix.

  4. I totally agree that we shouldn’t feel forced to do something, buy something or have sex because it’s feb 14, but it all depends on how we look at the day. I read a post where a dad brought hi daughter a Teddy Bear and she was annoyed at him because she thought Valentines day would mean spending the day as a family and sharing a meal. I thought this was so cute, she is only 4 and to me she gets it right! Valentines day is a chance to be with the ones we love, not just a partner but our kids too! Or day we love ourselves and treat ourselves nice. Which is exactly what you planned, to be with your kids and watch the walking dead, to me that is perfect! I spent it with my hubby, kids, pets and my parents and it was a lovely day xx

    1. It does but now I don’t even care for it in the dating arena. I’d much rather spend the holiday alone and/or with my kids lol! 😉

    1. When I was married I got bored with doing the same thing every year so I just stopped celebrating. Now that I’m single I am back to doing what I did before marriage: wine, chocolates, Chinese food, and horror movies. Lol! I live horror movies.

  5. As you already know, I am right here with you on this. I totally agree that for a gesture or a night out or whatever to be romantic, it has to be spontaneous. Something someone does for you because they want to, not because they have to because it’s that day. Loving the Sheldon quote 🙂 Thanks for hosting #manicmondays
    Debbie
    Random Musings recently posted…Anything Goes Linky Week 33My Profile

    1. Yes, we are in total agreement with this. I absolutely believe it’s all about being real with your partner and I don’t see Valentine’s Day as something that promotes that. I love Sheldon! He’s one of my favorite TV characters. I watch the Big Bang Theory because of him. LOL!

  6. Your day sounds pretty awesome 🙂 I am not a massive fan of Valentine’s. We are so busy that we might well forget to have any romance without the prompt! But you are right – it is much better when spontaneous! #effitfriday

    1. I prefer spontaneous over planned any day of the year. I am looking forward to spending the day with my boys! Thanks so much for stopping by!😉

    1. My ex was more about the romance and I was at first but then I just got bored with it. This year though I’m looking forward to celebrating it with my kids. I can’t wait to see the look on their faces when I surprise them with Laser tag!😊

  7. It’s a funny one isn’t it? I’m with you thinking it’s overrated. Mind you the Valentine’s Day memory that stands out for me is actually quite romantic in an odd sort of way. When my husband I had been going out for a couple of years we had Valentines Dinner at Cafe Rouge. I’d been vegetarian for several years but that night I decided that I was probably going to stay with my carnivorous bloke for the duration, so I might as well order a steak.😂 (Will of iron, me!)

    1. Yeah I am looking forward to seeing the surprised look on my boys’ faces! I forget every year. That is until this year when my teenager kept reminding me. Lol! 😉

    1. And not very genuine in my opinion. If my man is going to do something special for me I want him to do because he wants to and genuinely wants to make me happy, not because some lame holiday says he has to. Thanks for reading and commenting Jeremy!😊

        1. That is the best way I can describe my entire post and you said it perfectly, LOL! Thanks so much for reading and commenting Jeremy!

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